Two Chocolate Chips off the Old Block

Outside of Cain and Abel, it’s hard to picture two more competitive brothers than Al and Anthony Butterman.

All their lives the siblings, who were born just 10 months apart (what can we say, their mom Joyce didn’t waste any time) competed in just about everything they did.

As toddlers in side-by-side highchairs they’d race to see who would finish eating first, with the angry loser often shoving his brother’s face into his bowl.

As they got older games like checkers or Monopoly usually ended with the loser flinging the game board across the room. When racing their bikes Al, a notoriously slower peddler, would get close enough to jam a stick into the spokes of Anthony’s rear tire, sending him careening out of control.

In college the boys competed to see who could have sex with the most women, a contest that lasted until Anthony learned that Al was hiring prostitutes to help him keep up.

Joyce tried to have them learn the spirit of cooperation at a young age by teaching them to make chocolate chip cookies, figuring they couldn’t argue who made the best cookies if they made them together.

Invariably they would argue over things like who was the best flour measurer, who was the best egg beater and who was the most well-endowed (OK, so it wasn’t all about the cookies. These are boys starting puberty that we’re talking about, not the Pillsbury Doughboy and his brother, who never hit it big enough for anyone to know his name anyway).

After graduating from college, Anthony decided to start his own chocolate chip cookie business. He called it the Anthony Butterman Chocolate Chip Cookie Co., and the first time it was listed in the phone book he proudly showed it to his brother.

This, of course, didn’t sit well with the competitive Al, who decided to start his own chocolate chip cookie company. When the phone book came out the next year, he didn’t hesitate to show his brother that the Al Butterman Chocolate Cookie Co. was listed before the Anthony Butterman Chocolate Chip Cookie Co.

Anthony wasn’t going to take this lying down (although he did enjoy taking naps). He renamed his company, and the next year he couldn’t wait to show Al that his Ajax Chocolate Chip Cookie Co. was listed before the Al Butterman Chocolate Chip Cookie Co.

This meant war to Al. He changed the name of his company and the next year, on the day the phone books came out, he raced out to the street to meet Anthony and show him that his Acme Chocolate Chip Cookie Co. was listed ahead of the Ajax Chocolate Chip Cookie Co.

As the two brothers argued they heard a car horn beep from the street. It was Joyce, who called them over and then took the phone book from Al.

“Check this out,” she said, pointing to her new business: The AAA Chocolate Chip Cookie Co.

“How’s the view look from down there, boys?” Joyce said before tossing the phone book on the sidewalk and driving away.

So, it appears the apples really don’t fall far from the tree after all.